So I thought I knew Something True about Every Married Woman, turns out I did not!

Visiting Indian Ladder Trail last week I met a lovely woman who was very gregarious and open.  Fun conversationalist, we had a chat for a half hour or so while she was waiting for her husband of 54 years and her 17 y o granddaughter to meet her at the top, at the new visitor's center.  Her enthusiasm for life and family was refreshing.

She talked of hiking the ILT in the winter ice decades ago with a broken leg, cross country skiing across the road, now she travels to see family from Seattle, WA to Hawaii while living in upstate NY. She said all her relatives are gone now but her husband has a family reunion every year and he has 8 siblings so the reunion has around 100 attendants every year. All these years later they still get together for a reunion that lasts a week up here.  They do things together all week before returning back to their homes in other states.  Sounds wonderful to be connected to your folks like this.

In our conversation I asked, the secret to your long marriage is?  She said, "Communication, talk everything out, and see things from the other one's point of view and compromise."

Here's where I thought I knew something about every marriage... I said, "Every marriage has ups and downs and times you want to throw in the towel, and she answered...

"We have had ups and downs but I never wanted to end the marriage. I knew we would work it out and get through hard times together."

Surprised, I learned something new today, everyone does not think of divorce in hard times. Maybe her positive attitude and confidence in her choice to get married is foundational.

I, personally always stayed through hard times in our marriage because I knew I could get divorced if I really wanted to. Knowing I had this freedom gave me gumption to try one more time.

So next week is 39 years and counting.  Every year I learn more about him, me, and us. And we watch and listen to others in their marriage as we travel and realize we have it good.  (We have a lot more laughter, and lot less yelling, compromise is an art we have developed.)

This beautiful lady continued, "She was cleaning out the garage and decided to get rid of the cross country skis, I'm not going to do that again, I play golf with my husband now and we walk a lot. Hiking and strenuous sports activities are not for us now."

It was a pleasure to meet his vivacious and energetic lady. Her age?  82 y o.

What a great attitude and open heart.  I would like to be that upbeat and athletic at her age, she did not look a day over 73.  Her positive attitude was infectious and a close family that is a gift.

And I learned I am not always right again.