Something Every "Kind and Caring" Person Needs to Know...

A friend was sharing her struggles with the court system to get her addict son the help he needs instead of another stay in jail.  He was getting in trouble with drunk driving and having weed on him. In truth he is a heroin addict.  She is a professional and keeps this secret from everyone she works with, but she confides in me and her family.

She recently found another drug rehab program but her son cannot enter into it unless he has a job. Her brother-in-law owns three businesses in the area of the rehab center and she approached him to give her son a job.  He said simply, "No."  My friend who is older than me asked me, "How can he NOT do this one thing for my son? He owns three very successful businesses and he has so many employees he cannot possibly know them all or what their personal lives may be. For all he knows there may be addicts employed by him! This is his nephew, you'd think he want to help. I never asked him for anything before."

I told her, "I learned long ago that there are people in this world that have absolutely no feelings, no empathy, for another human being.  Especially when it comes to money and their OWN survival. No amount of praying, begging, or describing the seriousness of a situation will this other person care or do anything about it for another person. (Not their child, not their sister, not their mother, not their brother, etc.) I have seen it in the eyes of my own relatives and it is frustrating as a child seeing this growing up until you realize these persons do exist and live among us daily, even in our families.

When you realize these people are here, you find another way.  What seems like the easiest path because of what this person can do to help, is not going to happen, you move on, you have to. Fortunately the world does not revolve around this narcissistic personality."

Life is not fair when you are dealing with people who are concerned with their own wants and needs. However, that is most people you meet everyday, even ourselves. But life can be fair when you leave these people behind and move forward to find people who do care and will help your son. If you look to that one person or persons only, you make yourself their victim, you can become bitter.  This kind of anger hurts only you.

The self-centered people that do this to anyone also sleep well every night. These people (Including God-fearing ones) do not lose one wink of sleep over not helping you or doing the right thing to help a family member.  My experience taught me, do not lose sleep over them either, think for yourself and move on. Find another way. You will find another way if you do not give up. Family members that think like this will, if they decide to give minimal help...will give it reluctantly and put strings on helping you and expect you to owe them in the future. Unconditional love is not in their minds or hearts. Going to church is outwardly pious but you always see what is in a person's heart when asked to go outside themselves to help another.

There are good people out here but like I told my children, "Strangers have been kinder to me than my own family many times in my hour of need, and I thank goodness for these wonderful people and am glad, I found them. There are many good, good, people in the world, you will find them."