"Don't Go Near Her! She Slaps Everyone!"

Years ago I was in a nursing school clinical rotation at a nursing home. I was assigned to a quadriplegic woman who shared her room with a paraplegic woman.  My patient was so easy to care for, bathe, feed, give meds, and she slept most of the day. I pretty much just moved her ever so often and watched her sleep until next meds or feeding time. She did not talk much.

Across the room I saw a woman who was sitting up in her bed, applying makeup. Her hair was dyed black and she had so much makeup on she looked like a has been movie star that couldn't give up the limelight.  You know that "Baby Jane" look.  She did not talk either but she had an angry face always.

I sat on the chair next to my patient while I watched her RN and CNA come in to do her daily care. Sure enough the RN asked, “Mrs. Lewis, are you in a good mood today?"  "Why should I be I lie here all day no one comes to see me!"  

CNA, "I come to see you Mrs. Lewis." 

She, "You have to."  CNA "Now I have to turn you please don't hit me today."  

She, "Then don't hurt me!'

He finished her bathing with the RN helping.  She grumbled how bad the service was around here, "I hate it here."  They left, and I saw why she was not given to a nursing student.  

After they left, my patient was getting drowsy and I was talking to her roommate when my patient whispered to me, "Stay here, don't go near her, she slaps everyone!" I said, "Ok, thanks for the warning." 

My patient went to sleep and her roommate was still putting on makeup and brushing her hair. I remembered Dale Carnegie and began to ask her about her life.  She came from NYC.  She had been part of Vaudeville when she was young and later married 4 times, 2 divorces and 2 died and left her with money, and two ungrateful sons, her words.  She had travelled the world and had great stories.  

I told her I was tired, I had been up all night studying and had to get up at the crack of dawn.  I asked her if she would move over so I could lie down next to her and rest.  She said, "Sure thing honey, come over here, I'll take care of you."

I crawled into bed and told her, “Look out for my nursing instructor, if she finds me lying down on the job, I'll be in trouble!"  She said, "Alright."

She was under the sheets I was on top next to her.  She decided she wanted to share some cookies with me that she had hidden in her nightstand.  She put a napkin on my stomach and put two shortbread cookies on the napkin, asked me if I would like some water? I said, "Sure, thank you."

She moved her hospital table and got her pitcher of water, poured me a glass.  I lie next to her for an hour or two.  (Yes I got up and rotated my patient when needed)  She combed my hair, fixed my napkin, poured more water, gave me more cookies and I became her patient.  She was a sweetheart.

Later, my nursing instructor came breezing in, took a look around the room, did not see me in the bed with the patient across the room and left.  Quickly I got up and said, "Mrs. Lewis don't tell on me please."

Mrs. Lewis said, "I would not!"  My patient, woke up and saw me getting out of her neighbor's bed and said to me, "What were you doing in her bed?  She didn't slap you?"  I said, "No, she is really a nice person once you get to know her. I was having a rest and some cookies with her."

A few minutes later my clinical instructor came back in the room and sees me standing by the bed of my patient and says, "I was just in here where were you?"

"Around, I was here."  My instructor says, "Did I see you in bed with that patient over there or was I seeing things?"

"Ah, yes you did."

Mrs. Lewis pipes up and says to my teacher, "You do not get mad at her, she was helping me do something."

The teacher checked my charting and patient and all was good.  Upon leaving the room she said, "Come out in the hall Candy." 

 "You cannot get in bed with a patient, it does not bother me personally but there are state laws about this."

"Ok."

Well you don't need to be Einstein to see the moral of this tale, Mrs. Lewis was alive and dancing in her mind and now she could not move anymore.  She used to take care of others and she hated being dependent on them now to take care of her.

By me letting her take care of me, she felt needed again.  We all want to feel needed don't we?

And if you know me at all, YES I crawled into bed every day that week with Mrs. Lewis and made her smile, and me happy to have more of her tasty shortbread cookies and my favorite, her stories!  😘😉