Thursday, December 22, 2016

Who Am I Without My story of who I think I am?

If you read, sages teach it, we hear Buddhists teach it, but how to do it can be confusing, if I do it life is much easier.  To stretch my mind to believe what Byron Katie teaches about it seems impossible at first.  Each teach,
“To look back is to be depressed, to look forward is to be anxious, but to live in the now is to be present.”  .
Now Byron Katie who travels the world and teaches www.thework.com teaches we have no past and we have no future so to dream about either is to be caught up in our stories, (fantasy) which are gone. Each moment is new and yet it is gone as soon as the realization of it is here. If I don’t believe a thing a person is teaching, I dig deeper, I will at least consider it.  At Byron Katie’s website I printed out her “work sheet,” Four questions and a Turn Around.  The first time I worked on her worksheet I could not do it. So I set out to understand her way and do the work. (Just to boggle your mind, print out ONE work sheet and try to fill it in, the first time I could not fill it in, so I begin to study her work and teachings)
To live in the present means to be fulfilling my purpose, as matter of fact there are hundreds of books that try to teach me how to find the color of my parachute, I have read many.  The philosophy BK subscribes to you is that when you live in the present moment, your purpose will find you, so I can stop looking.  Her purpose found her and she is living it, she travels and teaches, four questions and a turn around.  She loves it.
Now people go to college, church or work, get married, have children, to find their purpose, or so they think.   These things give a sense of security but when negative life situations happen none of the successes you receive in any of these can’t prevent a downfall. The kind of strength that sees you through the hard time without divorce, alcohol, drug or food addictions comes from within. 
A purpose is not like any other, and it can only be known to the person seeking it.  College may be necessary to be a researcher in some fields, a doctor in the USA, lawyer in the USA, a licensed individual in the USA, but that degree is not who we are and it does not mean we know more or are more because of it.  The fact that there are countries, states, tribes, here in the USA that don’t have access to formal education or medical doctors and actually live according to the teachings of the last generation that taught them, and attain wellness and life is proof of this.
Most people are satisfied with a title, a position, even praise themselves for going to an Ivy League college, being a member of the largest congregational church, a member of a prestigious family, a gang member, own the best real estate, the best, the best, the best, the biggest, no end to the list of our accomplishments that make us more than who or what?  But this is not who we are or state our purpose. I have come to see when I am living a certain level of comfort, I can slip away, disappear in to the background and not do more if I don’t want to. 
It is the struggle that makes me move, makes me creative, helps me find and live life with my purpose.   Opportunities are shut doors to me if I stop going through them.  To go the next door of opportunity I have to look for it.
So I’ll leave, thinking about “Who would I be without my story?”
Frightening to think about losing my story, how could I possibly identify me?    






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