Defense, First Act of War, Try Thank You Instead

Byron Katie teaches how to rid the mind of all stressful thinking.  But how do I deal with other people that are trying to mess with my stress free life?  Recently I was visiting a family member who was in a bad mood.  I knew this and tried to keep conversation light when at the first glance of finding disagreement he pounced.  Now every bad thing he could think of concerning me, came out of his mouth to me.

A student of Byron Katie for a couple years with daily practice, strangely this did not bother me.  I found I wanted to remain silent, BK teaches: "Defence, first act of war."  This came to mind. I wanted to see if there was any truth in what he said, "So I began to say thank you."

He said, "What?"  I said, "Thank you."  He said, "What." I said, "Thank you for giving me your honest opinion, I like people to be real with me.  That is the most loving thing anyone can do for me, is to be real, honest with me. So, thank you."

Then I began to list reasons I was thankful for this person in my life.  Thankful for letting me stay with him a couple of days, thankful for making a cup of tea for me, I really am thankful to have you in my life.  Here's the truth, I AM thankful for him.  He's usually very nice.

Then he began to cry and be quiet.  I told him I loved him and if he wanted to tell me anything else I would listen.  He calmed down, the anger he had displayed seemed to leave as quickly as it came. We talked calmly and then continued with our day.

I came upon this suddenly and without premeditated thought. I guess BK teachings are beginning to sink in.  Thank goodness. I am so tired of being angry, so tired of being selfish, if war is to end, peace must begin with me.