My Children Learned Nothing From Me

Have you ever really watched a baby?  A newborn that acts on instinct is very simple.  A baby wakes to let you know they need a hug, a diaper change, food.  If you watch a baby before she makes a noise, the baby will stretch in the cradle, from head to toe before being fully awake. Nothing special, just living.

Now Harvard has done an "official study" that proclaims, we humans should stretch every morning before getting out of bed.  Thank you Harvard!

We are told by scientist and physicians to not run out of the house without eating breakfast. This meal is the most important of the day.  A baby will not be quiet until the baby has breakfast.  Thank you scientist and physicians!

The baby every morning takes care of personal needs before being distracted by other things. Nothing needs to be taught here, nothing special, just living.

Somewhere between birth and now we learn to not to take care of our physical needs first anymore. We don't know how to do "nothing," and just live anymore.

Then life speeds up and takes over. We are adults on a treadmill that gets faster and faster, working harder and harder, longer hours, always something to do.  It seems we don't stop until life makes us stop.  An illness, an emotional overload, can't sleep, back aches, stomachaches, an accident, a death, maybe we develop an addiction to escape the treadmill or we develop negative attitudes about everything we have to do but we forget we put that on our own plate to do!  Nothing special, living is becoming hard and fast.

If we could become like we were when we first arrived, acting on instinct we would take care of basic needs and then take a break to do "nothing" special except to be fascinated by the simple things we once found so wonderful to do when we were young.  Maybe there would be less anxiety and anger for all of us. I knew how to do "nothing" when I was young and did it often joyfully.

I did not slow down again until we had children and the children taught me what was really important, time with them, doing "nothing." No rushing out the door to work, school, daycare, but slowing down, calming down.  Peaceful mornings taking it slow, taking our time, being present and happy.

Draw a doodle, stare at an insect, make an animal shape out of clouds, lie on the grass, smell flowers, climb a tree, play with play dough, go for a walk, put oatmeal in our hair, happy to be alone in silence, without watching a clock. Maybe if we could calm down as life speeds up, there would be less anxiety.

I did not put our children in daycare, so we could be working, to have more things. I did not sign them up for every camp, activity, sport, enrichment program for babies, so we could work year round. I actually spent time doing "nothing" but being present playing with them.

Our purpose was intentional, we wanted to instill in them a love for nature, a feeling of security knowing we were always there, especially when they were babies. We wanted them to feel safe and loved.

Others may say, "You did not do enough to prepare them for school, or enrich their lives."  I say, "These are not your children."  Our children have become kind and loving adults.

Of all the things they may have learned from me, I hope "nothing" was enough.