Monday, May 22, 2017

Have You Met This Family Member? The COA?

You know the one that has to be the "Center Of Attention?  If anyone else has a special day, a special occasion, anything outside of him or her…the COA, will find a way to get the focus on him/her again.

I experienced this person recently.  This post is for anyone that has had to stand in the shadow of this narcissist… There are two way to think about this. One way will lead to anger and bitterness, the other will lead to freedom and joy.
     
1) Get angry and tell them to get out of your way. (“Defense first act of war” ~ Byron Katie warns about this)

2)  Speak with them explaining your boundaries, letting him/her know this is not about him/her and then “heap loads of kindness on their head.”  (And make plans to move away and find your own life Skeeter)

One thing that seems preposterous but true is this…when a person really claims his/her own independence against the protest of family and friends and goes out and makes a life of his/her own choosing, not only is the joy of living life on your terms discovered but the narcissist will admire you for it!

In America we have this freedom.  Free to live and achieve as much as we want as far as our mind can see.  But we will never do this if we hold on to “Old School” ways that exhaust and defeat new ideas and ways of living.  Inner peace, inner confidence, so necessary to move out in the world.

Grab for "The Brass Ring."  Someone will get it, "Why not you?"


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