Ours But Not Ours

The day each of our children were born I asked God to make me a wonderful memory for them and to help me "Let each go."  The day of birth for me was a day I wanted to put each of them in my pocket and carry them around safely so no one could ever hurt them for the rest of their lives.  I wanted no one to breathe on them, they might have germs...  I found this responsibility to be the biggest commitment I have ever made to another human being outside of marriage and also impossible to keep the children in a mother's cocoon of safety. 

I knew some way somehow, we would be there for them forever.  We would never leave them or forsake them, they would always know they were good, they were loved, they were wanted, that we had their back, we would never let them down, we would teach them they had talent, that they were here for a purpose outside of themselves, to be of service and good cheer to this world. We would help to educate them, we would be there in bad times, their hours of need, we would give to them financially, unconditionally because we decided to bring them in this world, we owed them everything we could give for them to live a life of their choosing.

If we lived up to this, one would have to ask them.  Everyone has their perspective and certainly the children have their own.  They have roots and wings. So many families give their children roots but then hold them back, hold them down, with traditions and obligations.  We did not want this for ours. We realized they are their own person, they have to find their own way in this world and as adult children, we knew our work of basic training was over (When they are 12 if it ain't in there by then it is too late) and now we love and wait for them to come to us or ask questions. I will say as a mother of adult children, if I hear one may be distraught or stuck, I will try to share what I have come to know, and this is the world may be challenging to understand at times but if you truly know yourself and stay focused on your goals, in time you will see you will absolutely live your dreams.

Always choose to be happy. If you are not happy, accept the situation or change it without hesitation.  Maybe the greatest familial lesson we have taught these wonderful children is to always have each others' back, support each others' endeavors and never let anyone come between them, not even a spouse.  (The right spouse would never try)

It is your life not ours, your life was never ours but my God it was fun raising you. Namaste.